Archive for November, 2013


Thank You!

I just wish to thank all my followers and supporters on the blogosphere for being such an inspiration to this ministry.  Since I have begun my journey of blogging, I have created some wonderful network of supporters.

To all my followers: This blog would not be possible without your support. Thank you all, and please have a Happy Thanksgiving!

Remember, in all things; give thanks unto the Lord; for He is good and His mercy endures for ever (Psalms 136:1).

 

Often times when a marriage fails, you will hear the same familiar story, ‘we fell out of love with each other, or we just grew apart from each other.’  However, if those couples who are making these statements were building and maintaining intimacy and love in their marriage, then there would be no time to fall out of love, or grow apart from each other.

I will now share a story with you, which depicts how important it is to build and maintain intimacy and love in your relationship.

lovers-wallpaper

To those who are married, not married… and soon to be married
When I got home that night, as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, “I’ve got something to tell you.” She sat down and ate quietly. Again, I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. However, I had to let her know what I was thinking. “I want a divorce.” I said calmly.

She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, “Why?”

I avoided her question, and this made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, “You are not a man!” That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping, and I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. Despite this fact, I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn’t love her anymore; I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement, which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had now become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy, but I could not take back what I had said, because I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me, her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper, but went straight to sleep. I fell asleep very fast, because I was tired after an adventurous day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care, so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce.

She requested that in that one month, we should both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. In addition, she had something more for me to do. She asked me to recall how I had carried her into our bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door every morning. This unusual request had me thinking that she was going crazy. Needless to say, just to make our last days together more bearable, I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife’s divorce conditions, but she laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. “No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce,” she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, “Daddy is holding mummy in his arms,” He said.  His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door. I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, “Don’t tell our son about the divorce.” I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to go to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easier. She leaned on my chest, and I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized that she was not young any more either. There were fine wrinkles on her face and her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me more stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning, so she tried on quite a few dresses, but could not find a suitable one. She then sighed, “All my dresses have grown bigger.” I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, and that was the reason why I could carry her so easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at that moment and said, “Dad, it’s time to carry mum out.” Seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last-minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms, I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, “I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy.”

I drove to the office… jumped out of the car swiftly, without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind… I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, “Sorry Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.”

She looked at me astonished, and then touched my forehead, “Do you have a fever?” She asked. I moved her hand off my head, “Sorry Dew, I won’t divorce,” I said.
“My marriage life was boring, probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore.  Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day, I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. ”

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

On my way home, I stopped at the floral shop, where I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The sales girl asked me what to write on the card, and I smiled and wrote, “I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us part.”

That evening when I arrived home, flowers in hand and a smile on my face, I ran upstairs, only to find my wife in the bed – dead.

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, or a bunch of money in the bank. These things create an environment conducive for happiness, but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build and maintain intimacy and love.

Do have a real happy marriage!

 

hymns
Do you know your (specific) hymn(s)? When you go to Church this weekend be sure to smile as you go through your Hymnals!  

Dentist’s Hymn………………………….Crown Him with Many Crowns

Weatherman’s Hymn…………………There Shall Be Showers of Blessings

Contractor’s Hymn……………………The Church Has One Foundation

The Tailor’s Hymn……………………..Holy, Holy, Holy

The Golfer’s Hymn…………………….There’s a Green Hill Far Away

The Politician’s Hymn………………..Standing on the Promises

Optometrist’s Hymn…………………..Open My Eyes That I Might See

The IRS Agent’s Hymn………………..I Surrender All

The Gossip’s Hymn…………………….Pass It On

The Electrician’s Hymn……………….Send The Light

The Shopper’s Hymn…………………..Sweet Bye and Bye

The Realtor’s Hymn……………………..I’ve Got a Mansion Just over the Hilltop

The Massage Therapists Hymn…….He Touched Me

The Doctor’s Hymn……………………….The Great Physician

AND for those who speed on the highway – a few hymns:

45mph……………….God Will Take Care of You

65mph……………….Nearer My God To Thee

85mph……………….This World Is Not My Home

95mph………………..Lord, I’m Coming Home

100mph………………Precious Memories

Enjoy the Fruit of Your Labor

“You will eat the fruit of your labor: blessings and prosperity will be yours” (Psalms 128:2).

fruits

Now you have worked hard, developed ideas, plans, creativity and innovation, along with your faith in God to accomplish your long desired dreams. However, ever since God has begun to bless and prosper you, there might be people around you who have become envious, jealous and hateful of your blessings and prosperity.  Regardless, you have all right to eat and enjoy the fruit of your labor.

While you were going through your trials and tribulations, only a few genuine people may have stood by your side when you needed them the most. Other than that, no one might have seen your blood, sweat and tears; but now they see the fruit of your labor and have become hateful. I will share a few lines of one of my favorite poems by Thomasine Robinson:

You See My Glory, But You Don’t Know My Story
I’ve been through trials and tribulations seen and unseen
I’ve cried myself to sleep, but I held on to my dream
My dream to rise to the top, Knowing with God, I can’t be stopped.

No one can prevent God from blessing you, unless you give them permission. With that being said, ignore the haters and enjoy the fruit of your labor!

loving-couple

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement.

They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful.

There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face.

In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you.

You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”
Bob Marley

Pray for the Philippines

Philippine typhoon death toll could reach 10,000. During this difficult time, we are calling all prayer warriors to Pray for the Phillipines

Are You a Prayer Warrior?

Prayer_Warriors

With the busy cares of your everyday life, which demand your attention, you might be so bombarded that you do not get enough time to pray. However, the enemy sets out to destroy your purpose and causes mayhem in your life. Therefore, you have to be consistent in your prayer life, in order to take back what the enemy has stolen from you, or is preventing you from obtaining from God.

In order to be victorious in your day-to-day life, you will have to take full control over your prayer life. You can’t fight this battle alone, as you are not fighting against flesh and blood, but against spiritual wickedness in high places. Hence, you have to put on the full amour of God, in order to overcome the wiles of the devil. (Ephesians 6:11-18)

Do not be deceived by the lies that the enemy tells you, as he is a deceiver. Your enemy, which is Satan only comes to steal, kill and to destroy your marriage, your health, your children’s lives, your family, your job, your business and your finance. However, do not be dismayed, as God sent His son, so you can have life, and have it more abundantly. (John 10:10)

After being hit with various trials and tribulations in your life, you might just want to be weak and feel sorry for yourself, but now is not the time to roll over and play dead.  Moreover, you have the authority to win this war against the bad things that are happening in your life. The war is on! Begin to pray like a prayer warrior does. Pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5:17)

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